Anal Play 101
It’s 2020, stop pretending you don’t want to try anal play.
there are 4000 nerve endings in the sphincter… that’s the same as the head of a penis… Sure you don’t wanna give it a little go? Apart from all of the nerve endings waiting to be stimulated, here are some other things butt play does…
Anal Play for Male Bodies
Anal play for male bodies is mostly about stimulating the prostate. (The prostate is a gland located about two to three inches up, on the front wall of the rectum.) Some men can experience an orgasm JUST from having their prostate stimulated and these have been said to be more intense than an orgasm from stimulation of the penis. Wearing a butt plug can stimulate the prostate adding a new experience to masturbation, oral or intercourse.
Anal Play for Female Bodies
Wearing a butt plug can create a heightened level of sensation and tightness to the vagina by directly putting pressure on the back of the vaginal wall. Additionally, as the pelvic floor muscles begin to contract during orgasm, the anal muscles contract around the plug, making the spasms feel stronger and harder, increasing the intensity of the orgasm.
Plus never underestimate the power of analinguis or a lil’ rectum rub (cheeky digit anyone?).
Communication is key to a healthy relationship and writing this I am going on the assumption you’re playing with a partner that you are able to have open and honest conversations with, and you’re both there for the pleasure of both parties. Otherwise wtf are you doing with them… Always discuss any new ventures with your partner, and (it should go without saying) don’t pressure them into anything they aren’t comfortable with. If you’ve been curious about anal play and don’t know how to talk to your partner about it, read this.
Now, the most important things to remember when indulging in any anal play are RELAXATION, LUBRICATION and COMMUNICATION. I put them in bold.. because that’s how important they are..
RELAXATION
The rectum has two sphincters, the external sphincter, we have control over, the internal sphincter we do not. This is why you need to be in a complete state of relaxation and arousal. Take some deep relaxing breathes and if you’re still too “tense”, no pressure! Try a little more foreplay!
LUBRICATION
Unlike the vagina, the rectum does not self lubricate and on top of that, the tissue is much, much thinner. This is why lubricant is so important. Incredibly important. Seriously its really important and you should cover everything in lube. Your butt, your fingers, your toys, your lover, everything.
COMMUNICATION
As with all exploration, start with something small, a finger or a toy of similar size. Start slow, massage the surrounding area (with tons of lube), communicate, see how they are feeling and when they are ready, work your way in. Once you’re in, it’s a good idea to pause, let your partner and their body adjust to this new sensation before you start to thrust anything. If you’re going solo it is still important to check in with yourself. Be present and take the time to enjoy yourself.
HOT TIP If you are having a little trouble inserting, try gently “pushing out” (my delicate way of saying “like you’re trying to push out a fart”) and when you relax your vacuum butt will do its job. Which brings me to my next point.
SAFETY
Once you get passed the initial muscle barriers, the anal cavity acts as a vacuum. So please, PLEASE do NOT put ANYTHING in your butt that doesn’t have a flange/base/ring aka the only thing between you exploring your body and an ER doctor exploring your body!
HYGIENE
We have a heap of bacteria in our anuses and that’s normal. But you need to be cautious of spreading germs. As always wash your hands and toys before and after play, if you’re going between anal and genital play, body safe antibacterial wipes come in handy. The safest way is to indulge in anal play is to use a condom.
If you have toys that can be used for vaginal and anal stimulation or will be shared between players, put a rubber on it. Especially if it’s made from porous material.
DOUCHING
I think some of the stigma around anal comes from the fact that that’s where poo comes from. Lots of people won’t participate in anal without douching first and that’s fine, each to their own BUT there are possible side effects of regular douching and I can’t in good conscious tell you to go flush out your butt just for sex. If you try to “use the bathroom” and then give yourself a good wash, you should be fine. And if there is a bit of poo, there is a bit of poo, it’s your body’s natural function.
If there is a bit of poo, there is a bit of poo, thank you for coming to my TED talk.
Lastly here’s a little quote for all the fragile …people… out there…
“Please don’t make the mistake of thinking that a desire for anal pleasure is in any way related to gender or sexuality. If you’re an adult with a butt then you can enjoy anal play without it necessarily “making” you anything but an open-minded sexual adventurer. Sex toys are made for parts of the anatomy, not genders or sexualities!” – Cara Sutra
Always play within set limits, respect safe words and prioritise the physical, emotional and mental needs and well-being of those involved.
