Strap Ons 101

SEX
Thank you for your service, Broad City

Thank you for your service, Broad City

I UNDERSTAND STRAP-ONS AND STRAP-ON SEX IS NOT JUST FOR MALE/FEMALE PRESENTING PEOPLE. I WOULD HAVE LIKED TO HAVE SOME DIVERSITY IN THE IMAGERY BUT ANY SEARCH FOR SAME SEX STRAP ON SEX ONLY YEILED LEGIT PORN. CONTACT ME IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS, I’M ALWAYS LOOKING FOR INCLUSIVE ARTISTS.

First and foremost, let me just say, yes. YES. I am so into strap-on sex. I don’t care what gender or sexuality the participants are, I think it is so fucking hot. Soo yeh... I am jealous.

Using a strap on can be a fun and unique way to explore your sexuality and deepen your connection with your partner/s, regardless of genders. They can open a whole new world of intimacy and pleasure, but first you’re going to need to figure out what type of harness and dildo you want. Unless you already have those, then you can skip on ahead.

THE STYLE

There are two main styles of harness, the Jock Strap and the G String. Jock strap harnesses can leave the wearer feeling more exposed and open to play while the G-string harness can stimulate the groin area. Some feel they get better support from the jock strap and others say they prefer less straps and the G-string suits them better so the style is entirely up to personal preference.

THE MATERIALS

Budget definitely comes into play when picking what materials you want your harness to be made from. Perhaps you don’t care and just want whatever is cheapest? That’s fine! Just be mindful that when it comes to strap on harnesses, quality does make a difference.

Silicone strap on harnesses in jock strap and g-string style, leather harness with detachable ring front

Silicone strap on harnesses in jock strap and g-string style, leather harness with detachable ring front

THE DILDO

The dildo needs to be compatible with the harness, duh. Check the harness has a changeable ring (or some kind of adjustment) to fit different toys. 

When it comes to size, its helpful to think of your fingers, how many can you fit? 1? 2? Do you want more? A fist? Use that as your gauge and be cautious of your eyes being bigger than your... stomach... you don’t want to be uncomfortable.

 
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YOU’VE GOT YOUR HARNESS & DILDO... NOW WHAT?

Initially it can feel a little awkward wearing and using a strap on, if you don’t have a penis it helps to put on your harness and dildo and just walk around. It might seem a little strange but it helps get the feeling for your new appendage.

When you’re ready to use your new toys make sure you clean them first and have lubricant near by, its also a good idea to use condoms on the dildo if you plan on sharing the toy or switching between anal and vaginal penetration (new hole, new rubber). Get your harness on nice and tight and you’re good to go.

AFTERCARE

Strap on sex can be quite an emotional activity and regardless of sex or gender, trying something new can make us feel vulnerable, heck the vulnerability might be the draw card for you! You should talk to your partner, tell them how the activity is making you feel ex. “it’s so fucking hot seeing you bent over for me” “you look so sexy in that harness”. It doesn’t have to be “dirty” talk, just reassure each other that this is something you both want. Unless you don’t want to, in that case, don’t do it, if your partner is “making you”, leave them, they are a piece of shit, okurrr.

PARTING WORDS OF WISDOM

It may seem silly to mention but the dildo has no nerve endings and is not actually attached to you, meaning you won’t know what your partner is feeling. Check what is working for them and what isn’t. After all if it’s not pleasurable, what’s the point?

Always play within set limits, respect safe words and prioritise the physical, emotional and mental needs and well-being of those involved.

Jordan Hill

She/Her. Passionate about sexual health & education.

https://www.sextalkwithjordan.com
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